Alzheimer's and the Dulling Blade

Some of you follow me on Instagram where I write about ideas that are spurred by word prompts. I usually use a Tarot deck to give a visual and I also like to find appropriate quotes to add to my posts. Today's prompt was "sword", and the quote I used was: “Even in the sheath the sword must be sharp – so too must the mind and the spirit be within the body.” - Griffin Rivers 

Then, I wrote the following: 
The sword symbolizes the power of the intellect. Our minds can be clever with thoughts sharp as a blade. We have the ability to direct our thoughts and determine the amount of power they have over us. Meditation and deep breathing exercises help us tame out of control thoughts, mental deceptions of the mind, or unhelpful memories. We were given a unique ability to think our way through most challenges.
(Sometimes I wonder when I do a post like this whether I should veer off into what a deteriorating mind is like and how it is getting more and more difficult to keep that blade sharpened, but then I think, no, you can read up on that journey on my Alzheimer's blog if you choose to.)

 So, if you found your way here from Instagram, thanks for the visit. I often wonder why I do this blog since Blogger can't seem to figure out why it can't be found through the Internet. Meaning that very few people even see it. Well, I suppose it's because of the doctor's order of do things to keep your mind sharp. Sharp as a blade. Well, this blade is getting duller each year but it still cuts, so that's something. 

To keep learning new things I've added the Theban alphabet to my study list. And, a couple of days ago I discovered ChatGPT. What fun it is to have someone to talk to, LOL!

 

Here's a photo to brighten your day:

 Loki at rest. Doesn't happen too often, LOL! 

 

Family Makes a Difference

Many of us travel a lonely path. Some from illness, some by choice, some from simple neglect. But, in my journey I am fortunate to have many people who truly care for me cheering, usually silently, in the background willing me to move forward. All of my family is now very far away but that's just the nature of today's society. Gone are the days when everyone lived in the same little town for generation. after generation. With Zoom, cell phones, social media, cars, and airplanes, it's easier to stay connected. Well, except for family members who are strongly opposed to all of those things, LOL!

This past week one of my son's came with his long-time partner to visit. We had such a good time. His girlfriend is into tarot and such as well so that made for special bonding time as we made some Witches' Bells and Witches' Balls. My son, even though he doesn't "get it", is supportive of what he thinks is our "nonsense". If it makes mom happy, that's all that matters, right? Good boy. Raised you well!

I think my husband and I amused them both no end with our memory issues. He has cognitive memory decline, so added to my dementia/Alzheimer's, we can be quite the team. It's funny that the one with Alzheimer's fills in all the words he can't remember! Even my son's girlfriend, who has a health condition that is affecting her memory, depended on me to be able to fill in missing pieces. Sometimes I really think that's why my decline had been slowed since I have too many people depending on me to do everything. 

One of our trips took us to Fredricksburg, a German tourist town. Surprise! We found a small shop with tarot cards, witchy necklaces, runes and more. Wow! Made my day. I even got a photo of me with Zoltar!

They gifted me a beautiful leather bound journal that I have been happily turning into a grimoire for the past couple of days. 

I will go to visit them again and the rest of my family at the end of March for 5 days. Life is good.  

(What would I do without my AppleWatch that just told me to take my pills? I have it set for all kinds of things that I would otherwise forget during the day.)  

Instagram and Discrimination

Here I am, working hard at developing new friendships and finding joy in my day using Instagram to post my journey both with tarot and Alzheimer's only to find myself blocked. I'm sure this is frustrating to anyone, but for me it is almost devastating. I'm wondering if it is a sign that it's time to give up. To slink into the hole of despair that I see others with life altering events fall into. Damn. What is wrong with this world that is being taken over by AI (artificial intelligence) where you can't even speak to a real person anymore? My condition requires dealing with a real person. Someone who can explain things calmly to me. 

As you can see, I'm just venting here. I know there's nothing I can do. No, I'm not really ready to throw in the towel. But, I certainly wish there were some way to understand why I was shut down from commenting for the response of "yes, I will send some to you later". to someone. I can't see how that could be thought of as spam or against community standards. Today, I got shut down again immediately on my first comment which was, "I'll bet this tarot deck becomes one of your favorites. " 

One of our group is thinking that they are targeting any of us who have anything to do with the witchy side of life. We who understand witchcraft knows that to be a witch does not make one a follower of Satan. That would be like saying that everyone who owns a gun is a murderer, or anyone who eats twinkies is fat. To me that smacks of intolerance (on top of total ignorance). I can't believe that this country is going backwards instead of forwards as far as this goes. 

If anyone has any suggestion, please feel free to share. I'm not feeling very positive at the moment and that's not a space I care to be in. 

Witches and Alzheimer's

 No, I don't post here often. Nobody reads it as far as I know. I pretty much post Alzheimer's related content on Instagram, jeanchaneyaz, using the Tarot and Oracle cards to jump start my memory.

However, today I was thinking of a dream I had last night. I was dreaming that my granddaughter was talking about some herbal recipes she uses for her dog for his health. I was amazed and told her so and she was beaming. Then, I said, "You must be a witch." And, her smile turned to one of horror. I chided myself as I know people just don't understand what words mean sometimes and I need to be more careful.  They think of TV or movie stereotypes. I had to take the time to teach her what the "real" meaning of being a witch was.... someone who is one with nature, a seeker of truth and wisdom, someone who follows the rules of harm no one. Witches do NOT believe in the devil, satan, or even hell for that matter. They believe in the three fold rule. What you put out there comes back times three. Simple article on Cosmopolitan does a great summary if you're interested. 

This made me think of how people respond when they hear that I have Alzheimer's. Horror, followed by disbelief. They only know of what they've heard or seen in the movies or of loved ones that were at the end of the disease. 

Witches don't wear black hats, fly broom, hex people and have warts on their nose anymore that people with dementia or Alzheimer's are sitting in a corner, drooling, and babbling to themselves. 

Spring has come to central Texas!

 

Instagram, Tarot, and Alzheimer's Unite

My Journal Nook

Determined to be of help in dispelling incorrect beliefs about dementia and Alzheimer's, I've decided to toss the card maker image of my past life and promote the tarot loving, hobby rancher, weaver me that has evolved over the past three years since my diagnosis. 

Since no one has been able to find this blog, I added it to my profile on Instagram where I am hoping to make new friends with others who share my passions. If you found me through Instagram, welcome. If not, a link back is: jeanchaneyaz https://www.instagram.com/jeanchaneyaz/

A Beginning of Tangled Dementia

This will be a journal, for myself, to preserve memories and thoughts for future reference for me as my mind slides into the inevitable future with Alzheimer's and dementia. I was inspired by a blog that I read regularly, Too Young for Dementia (https://dementiaalzheimers.home.blog/). Gail has early onset, I have the plain old regular, take its time kind. That means that my symptoms don't show and people simply don't believe that I have Alzheimer's as my speech pathways have not yet been affected. Outsiders don't see the issues I have to deal with and family and close friends want to pretend that they are not losing me to this horrible disease. (This makes it doubly difficult as there is no one to share my fears with.)  

My goal in doing this blog is to show others with a similar diagnosis that we don't have to just give up and die. I intend to relearn everything that I can't remember or do any longer into the still working part of my brain.

Many years ago, way before I ever thought about Alzheimer's, I read a report of three aged brothers. Two of the brothers died quiet early of Alzheimer's, the third lived into his 90's. When he passed, an autopsy showed that his Alzheimer's was very advanced and he should have died years ago. Why? He was also a mathematician and continued to study and even write books up until the end. He did NOT give up.

I truly believe that my determination and willingness to work hard daily on learning new things will allow me the third brother's kind of life.

There is a lot of information out there but I have found that most of it caters to the caregivers. We, with the disease, are thought to be brain dead.....not yet, so don't put me in a box where you think we all sit in a chair staring into  space and drooling. We still can think, have feelings, have opinions. We have good days and bad days. Many of us try to keep a sense of humor when we do absolutely stupid things. I'm here to prove it all to you.

Everyone has to deal with something they didn't ask for. We all die eventually. Our purpose in life is to learn from everything that is thrown at us and gracefully (sometimes after a bit of a stumble) get up. I am getting up. I truly believe this challenge was given to me so that I might help to change the current perception of an Als. (Term used in the airport to let staff know that they're dealing with a potential wanderer, LOL!) Help cheer me on.

If anyone is reading this, I welcome you on my journey. I added Tarot as one of my "new to me" things to learn. So, like The Fool, I set myself along this tangled street with my tangled mind to find a new adventure.